January Update: "Willpower is Overrated"

In a recent piece from Angela Duckworth, author of Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance and a beloved guest on many podcasts, she points out that “willpower is overrated” when it comes to making and actually keeping our New Year’s resolutions.

What we all need more of is “situational agency”–basically, we are setting ourselves up for success. For example, if our goal is to ride the stationary bike every morning, we need to prep our coffee and put out our biking clothes the night before. If our goal is to be more present with our family, then we need to walk in the house, plug our phones into the hidden charger in the entryway and leave the room.

Recent studies have shown that phone-free schools that require children (and adults) to leave their phones in their lockers or digital lockers are more active, engaged and present in school environments. Over the holidays, many of us have experienced the moment when we WERE trying to be present–but someone got on their phone and we just sat and waited for them to be done…or we just hopped on our phone to kill the time.

But time is our most precious commodity, especially around the holidays, and especially with your kids and family. So how do we maximize it and not kill it? In her article, Duckworth writes, “You cannot change the conditions of modern life, but you are the sovereign ruler of what enters your personal space. Physical distance creates psychological distance: Draw close what you want more of, push away what you want less.”

Removing/distancing the negative “temptations” from our environments (phones, junk food, alcohol, tobacco, etc.) has been demonstrated to have a causal, positive effect on decreasing the overall use of those temptations. And with that extra mental energy and time? We are able to build more positive habits.

Part of the joy of a screen-free summer at camp is our ability to help campers reframe what they do with their downtime and to help them deepen their own reservoirs of grit and self-efficacy. By giving kids the opportunity to be fully disconnected from their phones for either 2 weeks or a month, we are providing them with an opportunity to build more positive habits and to see the value in authentic connections.

During their time at sleepaway camp, campers’ are able to “draw close” what they want more of: deep friendships; exciting outdoor adventures; leadership skills and an understanding that they do not need to be on their phones. In fact, they realize that NOT being on their phones makes them part of an actual community and provides them with tangible, real life, applicable skills that have a positive influence–not only on those around them–but on themselves.

Each year, we receive letters and photos from former campers or their families about trips they have taken and the profound impact camp has made on the campers who–in many cases–are helping lead the family adventure. Campers who call or email us to get our trip packet information to help them lead their dad up Mount Princeton or alums who reach out and ask for maps of our route in the Tarryalls or staff members who–after their first summer at Sanborn–apply to work again to help deepen their connection to the natural world and to a more authentic sense of themselves BEYOND their phones.

So, in this New Year, we hope you enjoy and maximize your time with the people you love…and that you have all put your hiking boots/running shoes/biking gear by the front door so you can spend that time together outdoors!

Happy New Year!